N K E - Moe The Chimp, and the story of St. James (K + E)

Years after the Travis the Chimp story,  I decided to pull this old write up I cobbled together and post it here on MetalThug.com. 

As you know by now, chimps seem to go crazy often so there is more than just one that happens to rip off an arm or two. I have never written anything on Travis, though I felt that story received more media attention than the attack on St. James. This article was originally written years ago. 

The below is a small part of the story of St. James and his chimp Moe, whom as you will see below if you actually read the article, wasn't involved in the attack on his owner (St. James), though is at the center of the story.

Best wishes and regards to St. James.

As mentioned, I went back in the archives and pulled this story. It is one I know much about, but this take on it is better then most. Credit to myself, and the original interview in Esquire. Also, the reviewer of the Esquire article who wrote some of what I have incorporated into this piece - If anyone finds out who this is let me know and I will gladly credit.

The worst part of this story is that Moe sat back and watched while his "Dad" was getting his arms ripped off and shoved up his ass. Now, I guess the best part of the story is also that Moe himself was not attacking and going ape shit, he was just excited to see his old owners and eat some god damn birthday cake - Since, I guess, chimps like cake. 

How about this: Chimps are fucking dangerous.

It is odd that they have such a capacity for intelligence and social interaction. Maybe that is why they are so interesting, that and they fact they are 96% the same as we are, as far as DNA is concerned. Well, needless to say, that 4% apparently makes a damn big difference.

Friends for life.

News heading? Terrible of course: Man loses face and testicle in ape attack at California Sanctuary

Moe the Chimpanzee was taken from a suburban Los Angeles home where he lived with St. James and LaDonna Davis in 1999 after Moe bit off part of a part of a woman’s finger while she was visiting them. Since then, Moe has been living in an animal sanctuary.

Ok, got that part?

Well St. James and LaDonna Davis recently visited the cage in the animal sanctuary where Moe is now living to celebrate his birthday and bring him a cake.

Not that Moe could give a damn about a cake, he is just an ape, but the Davises brought him one nonetheless.

Well while they were standing in front of Moe’s cage with the birthday cake, Buddy and Ollie, two of four chimps in the adjoining cage to Moe’s somehow escaped and immediately started attacking St. James and LaDonna.

Even the two ape babes that were in the cage with Buddy and Ollie, Susie and Bones managed to escape.

Amazingly LaDonna was only bitten on the hand, consequently while trying to protect her husband St. James, who by far got the worst of the attack, which resulted in having his balls literally ripped off as well as suffering massive wounds to his face, body and limbs.

The apes actually chewed off his face. 

Buddy and Ollie were shot dead at the scene but not before the damage had been done. However, the true tragedy of this story is that Moe didn’t lift a finger to help St. James or LaDonna - He just sat back and watched.
 
And what a scene he watched.
 
To give you an idea of how bad St. James got beat down, St. James is going to have to undergo extensive surgery to reattach his nose to his face.

There is no word yet if they are going to be able to reattach his testicles or his foot.

Yes, they also bit off this poor guy’s foot. When the son-n-law of the sanctuary’s owner finally arrived with his pistol and shot Buddy, Ollie deduced that he was probably next but instead of just running away he grabbed St. James, who at this time is nearly bleeding to death and literally dragged him down the road before he too was shot dead.

Maybe monkey behavioral specialists can shed some light as to why LaDonna was able to walk away with only a bite to her hand while her husband got his dick, his foot and his nose completely torn off and then to add insult to injury dragged down the road by his good foot.

So what do the experts say?

Apparently if you think Chimpanzees are these cute little apes that are a must for any loving home, think again before you put one underneath the Christmas tree for little Timmy.

Ape experts say that they are naturally aggressors and are known to kill rival chimps from neighboring groups, they hunt other primates and are obviously not above opening a can of “you don’t want none of this” on humans too if they forget to bring enough cake for everybody.

"Male chimps are intensely territorial. They defend their territory against any perceived threat," said Craig Stanford, a professor at the University of Southern California who studies primate behavior. "Chimps can be violent at times just as humans can be."

"Chimps can be as violent as humans can be?" Was that a little subliminal jab at the anti-evolution folks in Kansas professor Stanford?

Apparently Moe’s behavior can be at least partially explained as well.

Evidently his mother was killed by a poacher in Africa decades ago and it’s possible there is still some deep seated resentment there that needs to be addressed.

You know you always find people that are those bleeding hearts that want to take on problems like Moe and make things all better.

Well it looks like you can’t make Moe better. You just need to leave Moe alone.

Even after he bit the woman’s finger off the Davises apparently tried to launch a legal battle in the courts to bring Moe back from the sanctuary and back into their home.

That’s one reason why we have laws. To protect people from themselves apparently.

It’s not exactly clear how they feel about apes now in light of this incident. I guess we can always ask St. James after they reattach his nose, his testicles and his foot.